Guest Star: Melissa Clark

Please welcome my special guest on the blog today, Melissa Clark, author of Swimming Upstream, Slowly.

Summary:

After too many vodka tonics at her best friend's baby shower, twenty-seven-year-old Sasha finds herself having a ladies' room epiphany. How quickly life can change, she thinks to herself: one minute she's writing a master's thesis about a TV comedy show for kids–and the next, the program actually gets optioned with her as the star. But Sasha’s awe at the twists of fate proves to be premature. The real shock comes the next day, when her routine visit to the ob-gyn reveals that she’s pregnant—even though she hasn't slept with anyone in more than two years.

To her unbelieving ears comes the doctor’s diagnosis: Sasha’s body has unwittingly hosted a cellular hitchhiker, a medical anomaly known as “lazy sperm.” And now that this plodding genetic contribution has finally fulfilled its destiny, it will be up to Sasha to summon the courage to revisit her past loves even as her future slowly takes shape inside her. Which of her exes will be the father and how will he take the astounding news? And what will the end of the mystery mean to Sasha? The answers are revealed in this wonderfully inventive debut about the bonds that linger between people even after they part ways, and how the future can change in the twitch of a tail.

This book sounds fantastic and I'm excited to feature my interview with Melissa here. Check it out!

How do you come up with the names for your characters?

They seem to find me. I can't remember how I came up with "Sasha", but her last name is "Salter" and that is the last name of the friend who suggested I write my crazy idea as a book rather than a movie.

What's your favorite part about the publishing process?

I loved traveling to conferences and speaking on panels and doing readings. I was surprised at how much I enjoyed this part. This, of course, comes second to the actual act of writing the book in the first place.

When you got that first phone call announcing your had sold a novel, how did you react? How did you celebrate?

I have a crazy publishing story...probably too long to include here, but I knew from a third party that the editor was going to call and make me an offer before she did, so when she called I had to pretend I knew NOTHING. It was the best and only acting job of my life. I can't remember what happened when I hung up. Probably a lot of screaming and an embarrassing victory dance.

If your book were to be made into a movie, who could you see playing the lead role?

Jennifer Garner, Natalie Portman, Drew Barrymore... depending on who is free.


What was your inspiration behind your latest novel?

I was having lunch with a friend and overate. I lifted my shirt to expose my bloated belly and the friend said, half joking, "Are you sure you're not pregnant?" and I said, "Yeah, right, from a lazy sperm." I went home that night and started outlining the idea for a movie. I decided, eventually, to write it as a novel instead.

For more information about Melissa's hilarious novel, please visit her website: www.MelissaClark.org or her book's website: www.SwimmingUpstreamSlowly.com

More Twilight Easter Eggs

So, I caved and saw Twilight YET AGAIN today. And being that this was my fourth viewing I was able to catch a few more easter eggs that I managed to miss the last three times. An easter egg is a hardly-noticeable little detail that filmmakers or authors drop into their films or books for diehard fans (or just extremely observant people) to find. For those of you who missed my first posting on Twilight easter eggs, be sure to check it out here.

And here are three more to add to the list.

**WARNING: TWILIGHT SPOILERS HERE!

1) Wolf picture in Bella's room - Toward the beginning of the movie, when Bella first comes home to her dad's house in Forks, she walks into her new bedroom and behind her, on the wall, next to the door, is a picture of a wolf. Total foreshadow of book 2, New Moon and the forthcoming film adaptation.

2) Vegetarian Soul mates - So this easter egg (or small detail) is unique to the movie. It is not in the book. But I noticed that in the four times Bella is seen eating (twice with her dad, once in the cafeteria, and once with Edward in the restaurant), she is eating something vegetarian. Veggie burger, spinach salad, mushroom ravioli, etc. I think the filmmakers added this detail (in the book she eats meat) to mirror Edward's so-called "Vegetarianism" (the fact that his family doesn't eat humans).

3) Sleep Disorders - Okay, this one might be a stretch. But if you look closely, when Bella is in the hospital hallway, talking to her dad about the "almost" accident (just before she sees Edward again) behind them on the wall is a hospital directory. The fourth department listed on the directory is the "Sleep Disorder" Clinic. This could be a tongue-in-cheek reference to the fact that Edward (and all vampires) never sleep.

Okay, stay tuned. Maybe on my 5th viewing, I'll find more!

Guest Star: Malena Lott

Today our special guest star is the fabulous Malena Lott, author of DATING DAVINCI, about finding love and la dolce vita in the last place you would expect.

A Quick Summary:

Ramona Elise is in a rut--a 36-year-old widowed mother of two, she can't seem to find what make her truly happy in life. Making sure her kids are happy isn't the hard part; Ramona's looking for the passion she lost two years ago when she lost her husband and her world turned upside down. When a handsome Italian immigrant walks into her English class, Ramona never expects to find--la dolce vita (the sweet life)--in a younger man...or in her self!

I was lucky enough to be able to ask Malena some questions about her latest release and her career as an author. Check out my Q&A below!

Q: I LOVE the title of this book. How did you come up with it?

A: The title came pretty quickly, early on. I love alliteration and really wanted to incorporate da Vinci since he’s the catalyst that starts Ramona’s renaissance. Since publishers have final say, I don’t get too attached to my working title, though. I do like getting credit for this one, though! Of course the book isn’t just about da Vinci and romance is only a part of the story, but I think it’s catchy and hopefully it will catch people's eye to learn more about the book.

Q: As an author, what's your biggest fantasy? (the clean kind...just thought I'd clarify)

A: Writers already have active imaginations, so this one is a no brainer. Vision board, here I come! Hit the top 10 of the New York Times bestseller list, have a long line waiting for me when I arrive for book signings, have my books optioned for films that actually get made and made well, and a few national TV appearances to boot. TODAY show, The View, Oprah, you know. Just the small stuff, you know? Not that I’ve given any of this much thought. Not a bit.

Q: Procrastination is a big obstacle for me as a writer. What about you? Do you have any tricks for beating it?

A: I have to say, I'm pretty lucky. Hugh (Jackman) typically promises a shirtless steak dinner (him, not me) if I meet my word count goal. If that's not enough motivation, Brad's aromatherapy massages usually get me in the mood, though sad to say, it's not for writing. Heck, usually my imagination can trick me into getting back on the laptop to write away into the sunrise. Like, "finish this and you'll be as famous as Sophie Kinsella and you'll never have to buy groceries again and you can spend all your time lounging on the beaches drinking frozen Flirtinis!" I'm so easy.

Q: I, too, dream of becoming the next Sophie Kinsella! What would you do if it really were to happen?

A: Well, after hiring the cook, the nanny and the housekeeper, I guess I'd start interviewing stylists and personal shoppers (loathe grocery shopping.) No, seriously, I don't think much about my life would change except that I wouldn't get "that look" from my darling husband when I've gone on a shopping spree and I'd get to vacation more and feel good that my kids can go to college easily and perhaps not have to work as much as I did. *Not* that I'm complaining. On second thought, maybe I would spring for the housekeeper. Loathe laundry nearly as much as grocery shopping. That reminds me, that load needs to be changed out. Be back in a sec.

Q: Thanks so much Malena, do you have a sample chapter that readers can take a peek at?

A: Thank you! And yes, you can read the first chapter at www.MalenaLott.com

I'm on an ABC Commercial (well, my voice is anyway)

So if you've been watching ABC lately, you might have seen the following commercial playing in between your favorite ABC shows. And guess what? I'm the one singing background vocals in it. That's right! A friend of mine composes a lot of TV commercials and asked if I'd come in and sing for this one and of course I said, "sure!"

I was super excited when I was sitting around with my family over Thanksgiving watching the Charlie Brown Thanksgiving Special and suddenly there was my voice coming through the surround sound. Very strange. And if it sounds like there are ten of me, that's because I sang it about ten times with different harmonies. I'm my very own choir. :)

Anyway here it is (my part comes in around second 15) Happy Holidays!

Twilight Film - Hidden Easter Eggs

(Warning: Twilight Spoiler Alert!)

So I just saw the Twilight film for the third time today (yes, I know, I'm a sad, sad case) and I've been obsessed with finding little Easter eggs that the filmmakers put in for the very observant to find. Here's what I've found so far. Please let me know if I'm missing any!

1) Okay, my favorite first. When Bella is researching online the Quileute legends that Jacob told her about on the beach, she pulls up a Google book search and then clicks on a list of places the sell the book she's looking for. Just ABOVE the bookstore she clicks on from that list it says, "Little Brown" which is the publisher of the Twilight books.

2) Stephenie Meyer makes a cameo appearance in the diner that Bella and her father are eating at. She's sitting at the counter on her laptop and the waitress delivers her a plate and says, "Here's your veggie plate, Stephenie."

3) At the end of the film, after Edward leaves Bella alone at the prom and Jacob comes to talk to her, Edward says to her, "I leave you alone for five minutes and the wolves descend." Clearly this wolves reference is a foreshadow of the sequel in which Jacob turns into a werewolf.

4) In the cafeteria, when Bella drops an apple and Edward picks it up and hands it back to her, there's a close up on the apple being offered in Edward's two pale white hands. This is a reference to the cover image of Twilight.

5) Wolf picture in Bella's room - Toward the beginning of the movie, when Bella first comes home to her dad's house in Forks, she walks into her new bedroom and behind her, on the wall, next to the door, is a picture of a wolf. Total foreshadow of book 2, New Moon and the forthcoming film adaptation.

6) Vegetarian Soul mates - So this easter egg (or small detail) is unique to the movie. It is not in the book. But I noticed that in the four times Bella is seen eating (twice with her dad, once in the cafeteria, and once with Edward in the restaurant), she is eating something vegetarian. Veggie burger, spinach salad, mushroom ravioli, etc. I think the filmmakers added this detail (in the book she eats meat) to mirror Edward's so-called "Vegetarianism" (the fact that his family doesn't eat humans).

Any others? I'm dying to see if other fans found some that I missed!

Guest Star: Saralee Rosenberg

Today my guest is Saralee Rosenberg, the author of DEAR NEIGHBOR, DROP DEAD, a comic novel about two warring neighbors who put the Desperate Housewives of Wysteria Lane to shame!

Here's a brief summary of the novel and my interview with Saralee!


Nora Ephron Hates Her Neck. Big Deal! Mindy Sherman hates her whole body.

In Mindy's yoga-obsessed, thirty-is-the-new-wife neighborhood, every day is a battle between Dunkin' Donuts, her jaws-of-life jeans, and Beth Diamond, the self-absorbed sancti-mommy next door who looks sixteen from the back. So much for sharing the chores, the stores, and the occasional mischief to rival Wisteria Lane.

It's another day, another dilemma until Beth's marriage becomes fodder on Facebook. Suddenly the Ivy League blonde needs to be "friended," and Mindy is the last mom standing. Together they take on hormones and hunger, family feuds and fidelity, and a harrowing journey that spills the truth about an unplanned pregnancy and a seventy-year old miracle that altered their fates forever.

Dear Neighbor, Drop Dead is a hilarious, stirring romp over fences and defenses that begs the question, what did you do to deserve living next door to a crazy woman? Sometimes it's worth finding out.

Interview with Saralee Rosenberg

Q. What comes first? The title or the idea?

A. For DEAR NEIGHBOR, DROP DEAD, the title came to me only a few months before publication and trust me, by then I was in a total panic. The original title, based on the very earliest draft, was ALL IN THE CARDS, but everyone agreed that was kind of boring. Then I submitted a list of twenty titles, some interesting, some wacky, some that would never fly because they involved curse words. Here is a sampling: Hot, Hungry and Hormonal; Ask Your Doctor if Stress Is Right for You; Same SH-T, Different Zip; If Lucy Hated Ethel; and one of my personal favorites, The Bitch Next Door. No, no, no, my editor said to all of those. Then I came up with Dear Neighbor, Drop Dead and she smiled. We have a winner!!! And I must admit, it’s a beauty. Everyone gets it. No need for an explanation. As for my novel, CLAIRE VOYANT, that title came to me years ago and it took me a while to create an entire story based on the premise that a girl named Claire would have super natural abilities.

Q. Do you put friends in books? Have any of them recognized themselves?

A. I get asked all the time by family and friends to be in one of my novels, but I tend not to go there unless they’re willing to buy several dozen books in appreciation for being immortalized (if Girl Scout Moms can bribe, so can I). Once I did give in and named a character after a friend, only to describe the character as a philandering shoplifter. She was horrified and wanted to know how I knew? I didn’t know, I made it up, but boy did that make things interesting afterwards... Also, my husband’s business partner had been prodding me for years, to which I would say that a character who sold insurance, played golf and visited his grandkids in Florida would not exactly be memorable. But finally, in Dear Neighbor, to get him to stop bugging me, I did name a minor character Steven Hoffman. I made him a lawyer in Portland, and it really made Steve’s day... then he asked why he wasn’t a major character and could I feature him again in the next book? Men!!!!

Q. When deadlines hit, what happens in your house?

A. Let me put it this way. Please don’t ring my bell unless you’re bringing fresh baked cookies because I don’t want you to see that the dining room looks like a mini landfill. And that’s before you reach the piles on the stairs (I swear there is one that has been there since Clinton was President). The clothes in the dryer go round and round for days because I keep hitting wrinkle remove, we run out of milk, the shows saved on Tivo go unwatched, calls from my kids get answered with, “Make it quick and NO CRISIS’s today”. Also I look like hell and probably need of a touch up. As for dinner? The family is on their own... although they would tell you I say that every day. Basically it’s every man/child for himself and don’t give me a hard time about anything... This is why I write all the time, otherwise I’d lose my privileges, lol.

Q. Which scene or scenes in the book did you love writing?

A. I am crazy about writing dialogue and would spend days working on a scene between Mindy and Beth to make sure that I got the tone, the phrasing, the timing and the subtle nuances just right. There was so much that they wanted to say to each other after eight years of making each other crazy, I just had to let it out a little at a time, like air coming out of a balloon. But the scene I loved writing the most was the one where they are in a hotel room and Beth confronts the fact that she might be pregnant. It is a funny, poignant moment where both characters reveal their greatest joys and misgivings of motherhood and I remember when I sat at my computer, the words just poured out and I had to sit still to hear every last word coming through. I realized at the end that they had just broadcast my own conflicts and vulnerabilities about being a mom and it was whoa... where did that come from?

Q. What was the inspiration for Dear Neighbor, Drop Dead?

A. Of my four novels, DEAR NEIGHBOR, DROP DEAD is the only one that was inspired by, well, me! This story is based on my first novel, ALL IN THE CARDS, which was never published, but did take a very exciting journey to Hollywood. Back in 1997, Bette Midler optioned it for a feature film (she was looking for a follow up comedy to “First Wives Club”). Exactly! Wow! First time out and it’s a homerun. Sadly, the reason you never heard of it is because ultimately, Bette and her partner couldn’t get financing or find the right screenwriter to adapt it. Bye bye Bette... Now fast forward to a few years ago. My novels, A LITTLE HELP FROM ABOVE, CLAIRE VOYANT and FATE & MS. FORTUNE had done very well but were about single women looking for love in all the wrong places. I wanted to write about my “peeps” in the suburbs and pitched my editor on letting me rewrite ALL IN THE CARDS. She was hesitant because she wasn’t sure Avon was the right publisher for a suburban/soccer mom story with bickering neighbors. Then came “Desperate Housewives” and suddenly it was, get me suburban/soccer mom stories with bickering neighbors. Timing is everything.... So although DEAR NEIGHBOR is an incarnation of my earliest novel, it is a much richer, deeper, funnier story and is resonating with readers of all ages.

For more information about Saralee and her novels, please visit her website: www.saraleerosenberg.com

The Fidelity Files moves up to #25 in WhSmith UK

Last week the WhSmith Travel shops in the UK had THE FIDELITY FILES displayed as the number 52 bestselling paperback...and this week it's up to 25! And according to this picture, copies are selling out fast! (I swear, I didn't remove the rest of the copies before the picture was taken.)

Very exciting!

I knew I loved the Brits for more than just their accents and yummy tea sandwiches!

New 30-Second Trailer for WhSmith

Exciting news! WhSmith travel stores in the UK want to show the book trailer for THE FIDELITY FILES on the tv screens in all their stores! That means, any of you on the other side of the pond could be passing through Victoria station, picking up a newspaper and a Dairy Milk chocolate bar and see my trailer playing! How cool is that?

There was one stipulation, though. I had to cut a 1:30 minute trailer down to just 30 seconds. And any of you that have gotten through all 400 pages of my novel, know how hard it is for me to cut. So that's what I did ALL day yesterday and here's the final result. Of course, it'll look all that much cooler when you're seeing it while waiting for your flight at Gatwick airport!

Guest Star: Kelly Parra!

Hey everyone! I'm so excited to be part of a fantastic new community of authors called the Girlfriends Cyber Circuit where we host members on our blogs to help them promote their books!

So my very first hosted member is the fabulous, Ms. Kelly Parra who writes edgy YA novels. Her first book, Graffiti Girl has done extremely well and her latest release, Invisible Touch just hit bookstores this fall from MTV Books! I was fortunate enough to be able to ask Kelly some questions about herself and her writing process. And here they are!


1. How do you come up with the names for your characters?

Good question. I'm actually a pretty visual writer. I like to picture the characters in my mind, and then find the perfect fit with a name. Sometimes if I can't come up with something unique I'll scan the Internet or even the phone book to make the right match.

2. What's your favorite part about the publishing process? Your least favorite part?

Besides writing the book as my favorite part, I LOVE reading the galleys for the first time and seeing how the book's layout will potentially look in published form. My least favorite part is promotion, it takes a lot of hard work and lots of savvy to pull off good promo. :)

3. If your book were to be made into a movie, who could you see playing the lead role?

Kara would be possibly be Vanessa Hudgens.
Anthony would be a younger Milo Ventimiglia.

4. Since becoming a writer, what's the most glamorous thing you've ever done?

It might not seem very glamourous to some writers, but to a simple gal like me it was attending the Romance Writers of America RITA ceremony. The dresses were glam, the show fab. It was an experience to remember.

5. If you could be a superhero, what would you superpower be?

It would be transport anywhere by just a thought. That would be so cool. New York, no problem. Hawaii, just one second. :)

More information about Kelly Parra and her novels can be found on her website: www.KellyParra.com. Check it out!

The Fidelity Files is a bestseller in WHSmith in the UK!

So I just got back from an amazing trip to London and I bring with me some exciting news. The Fidelity Files has only been out for a little over a week in the UK, but it's doing extremely well!

WHSmith Travel shops (the ones in the train stations, tube stops and airports) display their books according to their own in-house sales chart and The Fidelity Files is number 52!

Here's the proof! This was taken from the WHSmith store in Waterloo station in London!

Win a UK Shopping Spree in association with The Fidelity Files!

To celebrate the launch of THE FIDELITY FILES in the UK, the fabulous high street shop, Dorothy Perkins (in association with Ebury Press and Cosmopolitan) is hosting a contest this month to win a shopping spree for £250 in their online store. Plus £50 gift cards to five runner-ups!

All you have to do to win, is click this link and sign up!

Unfortunately, this is only for UK residents...sorry! If I didn't live in the U.S. I'd enter to win myself!

But you can still check out the really cool details about the contest no matter where you live.

AND...check out this awesome "Look inside the book" widget that Ebury Press has published.

Good luck!

Official Release date of The Fidelity Files UK

Well, it's official, my book is finally British. Which basically just means it's in stores in Great Britain, not that it's started pronouncing words like "tomato" and "schedule" differently.

I'm so excited about this release! I got the final books in the mail a few weeks back and they look fantastic! Plus, I'm actually going out to London next week to help promote it!

My UK publisher (Ebury Press) has been nothing but fabulous and I couldn't be more happy with their work on this book. Please check out their UK site for the book at: http://www.TheFidelityFiles.co.uk and if you'd like to order your very own UK version of The Fidelity Files (they ship to the US, you know!), you can do so on Amazon.co.uk by clicking here.

Two new TWILIGHT scenes revealed...

These two exclusive sneak peeks from the upcoming release of Twilight aired during the season finale of Greek on ABC Family channel tonight. And of course, I've watched each one about ten times already (and counting...)

But it's late and time to go to sleep so I guess my date with Edward Cullen will have to be continued tomorrow. Meanwhile, I guess I'll share him...

Scene 1:




Scene 2:

My interview with P.C. Cast

Last week, I had a fantastic phone interview with P.C. Cast for the Halloween Edition of Free Book Friday and it's now available to listen to on FreeBookFriday.com. You can also sign up to be eligible to win one of two signed copies of her latest release, UNTAMED, the fourth book in the NYT Bestselling House of Night Series.

I hope you'll check it out!

French cover!

Today was a good day...my long awaited French cover for The Fidelity Files finally arrived! And I'm so excited about it. It's absolutely PERFECT!

The title means: "Confidentiality Guaranteed" and the tag line at the bottom translates to: "She could save your marriage...or destroy it."

The Fidelity Files Book Trailer wins "Best Author Made Book Video!"

The New Covey Trailer Awards is the most prestigious book trailer awards out there and The Fidelity Files won the category "Best Author Made Book Video" for the month of September!

Click here to see all the winners

Or visit our trailer page to learn more about the production and all the people who helped make it happen!

Rich Boys and Psychic Teens

This week I interviewed Jenny O'Connell for our Free Book Friday podcast and it was so much fun because although we've known each for years via email only, this was the first time we've ever spoken on the phone! And she was an absolute blast to talk to!

Check out her interview and enter to win a free signed copy of her latest YA novel, RICH BOYS at: www.FreeBookFriday.com

Oh...and I'm halfway through the galley of Alyson Noel's newest release, EVERMORE (about a psychic girl from Orange County who falls in love with a very mysterious stranger) and OMG....LOVING IT! It comes out in February of 2009 and it's already pre-selling like hotcakes on Amazon. Not to mention the huge...no, "Significant" sale it just had in Germany. This is going to be BIG. I may not be psychic like Ever, the main character, but I can see it.

The Fidelity Files - UK Website

Only 15 more days until The Fidelity Files hits the shelves of British bookstores and Ebury Press, my publisher across the pond has done a fantastic job on a special UK book website!

Check it out!

www.TheFidelityFiles.co.uk

And just as a side note: I really wanted to dub the book trailer in a British accent to make it more authentic, but I was overruled.

Win a free signed copy of Driving Sideways by Jess Riley

This week on Free Book Friday, we're giving away a free signed copy of Jess Riley's delightful debut, Driving Sideways about a 29-year old kidney transplant recipient who goes on a very entertaining road trip to find her donor's family because she's convinced she's channeling his spirit.

Go to: www.FreeBookFriday.com to sign up to win and listen to an exclusive interview with the author!

The Final Twilight Trailer!

It's finally here! The moment I've been waiting for! The final FULL-length trailer for the TWILIGHT movie has been released!

It's most exciting thing to happen to me in a long time (okay, yes, I realize the utter and profound sadness of that statement).



So...what do we think?

Free Book Friday

Like Fridays? Like Free Books?

Well, I've decided to combine the two in my new author promotion website...Free Book Friday!

www.FreeBookFriday.com

Each week, we'll feature a new author with an exclusive author interview podcast and host a drawing to win free signed copies of his/her book.

All you have to do to enter to win each week is sign up! Winners are chosen at random and posted on the site every Friday morning. Hence the name, "Free Book Friday!"

"But it sounds so simple," you say.

Well, that's because it is! So stop by and check it out!

The Cheating Gene

So it looks like "Ashlyn," the fidelity inspector in my novel, may have just been made obsolete by a scenitific breakthrough. Apparently, there's a study showing that monogamy can actually be linked to a man's genes, and not jeans as we all once thought.

According to an article I just read at on ABC.com, men who have more copies of a section of a gene called RS3 334, are more likely to cheat and have committment issues. Men who have no copies of the gene section are far more likely to be in long, faithful, committed relationships than men who have one, two or more copies.

I knew it! I've always said some men are just proned to cheat, like it's in their DNA or something. Turns out...it just might be!

Do you realize what this means? Pretty soon a standardized gene test will be mandatory on all first dates. "I'm sorry, Bob, you seem like a very nice guy, but frankly I'm concerned by your three copies of RS3-334. I just think I deserve better." Maybe they'll come out with nifty purse-size testing devices that you can carry around with you and use to scan a piece of his hair or fingernail. Or better yet, maybe it'll be a required field in all MySpace profiles.

Name: Bob Smith
Age: 32
Occupation: Sales man
Relationship Status: Single and looking
RS3-334 Copies: 4

But then, of course you realize what the next step is after this is? Rebellious teen girls are going to start bringing home guys with multiple copies of RS3-334 just to piss off their parents.

Win a Free Signed Copy of THE FIDELITY FILES!

Well, I just turned in my manuscript for the sequel to THE FIDELITY FILES, which will be out in Summer of 2009 and I'm so excited to be done with it, I decided to celebrate by giving away free copies of my first book! For the week of September 15th, I'll be giving out one book a day to a lucky winner!

Click here to sign up to be one of them!

The Fidelity Files Book Tour Photo Album

Well, I FINALLY got around to downloading all my tour pictures off my camera, sorting them, removing the hideous red eye that made me look like a character from the Twilight series and uploading them online. And here they are!

http://picasaweb.google.com/jess7878/TheFidelityFilesBookTour

Enjoy!

Christie Brinkley Should Have Hired a Fidelity Inspector

Okay, now that the book tour is officially over, it's time to get back to talking about serious stuff. Infidelity. And we all know there's PLENTY to talk about in this arena. I mean, the celebrities alone give me enough ammo to blog about the subject for a lifetime! Take Christie Brinkley and Peter Cook, the biggest celebrity cheating scandal in the news right now. And although I was just as fascinated as the rest of the world to be immersed in the trials and tribulations of someone else's divorce proceedings, I couldn't help but wonder, as I watched it all unfold, if the whole thing could have been avoided. If only Christie Brinkley had thought to hire a Fidelity Inspector, she would have known ages ago if Peter was the cheating type and this whole public scandal would cease to exist. If only my book had come out years ago when all of this went down, maybe should would have picked it up in the store, felt inspired and found a real-life fidelity inspector (they do exist!) to test her husband for cheating tendencies. But then of course, we would have lost such great entertainment value...

I'm Thankful for Coloradians and Canadians

The scream that erupted from my office this morning at the break of dawn when I awoke to check to see if my book had made the Denver Post bestseller list after a hugely successful signing event at the Tattered Cover last week most likely woke up the whole neighborhood. Because not only had the book made it into one of the top five coveted spots that the newspaper reserves for Colorado's bestselling paperback fiction books, it was number 2!!!

http://www.denverpost.com/books/ci_9711639

Needless to say, I have been floating the entire day.

And just as I was about to go to sleep and say goodnight to the most exciting day thus far in my debut book campaign, I discovered that the Canadians also seem to be taking a liking to the book! Amazon.ca has ranked it in the top 100 U.S. fiction books. You know, I always liked those Canadians. Not only for their universal health care and the adorable way they pronounce the words "about" and "out," but now, it has been brought to my attention that they also have impeccable taste in books!

Thanks Colorado and Canada for making what would have been an ordinary Sunday, absolutely extra-ordinary!

L.A. Release Party is a success!

So I know I'm supposed to be blogging about infidelity and cheating and all that, but I couldn't resist taking a short break from such heavy topics and sharing a few fun photos from The Fidelity Files release party last night. It was a huge success! Thanks to everyone who came out!

Me before my very first book signing for my very first book! Do I look calm and relaxed? It's an illusion. I was totally freaking out!


Talking about the book to a room full of people. Very scary! See that beautiful head of brown hair in front of the camera? That's the famous author Alyson Noel, who came to my reading! Unfortunately I was too busy trying to talk to everyone that I failed to get any pictures of her face. Oh well. Next time.



Signing my very first book! What a thrill!

These were the DELICIOUS cupcakes with the scarlet letter logo from the book on them. Click here to find out more about the logo. Thanks to Bella Donna Special Events for such a beautiful display!

The beautiful book display at the after party.


Hanging at the after party with some of my favorite people. From left to right: Charlie, my wonderful boyfriend, Katherine Carlson, my brilliant writer friend, and writer/director Brad T Gottfred whose movie I helped produce last year.

Window Displays are My New Favorite Thing

Well, the book has finally hit the stores...a few days early, but after a year and a half of waiting, what's a few days right? And how pleased I was to find this lovely display in the window at my local Barnes and Noble where I'll be doing my book signing on June 10th. Okay, "pleased" is probably not the most accurate term. More like jumping up and down ecstatically and making all kinds of strange, animal-like whooping sounds that I had no idea I even had the ability to make. Right there on the streets of the Third Street Promenade. Not surprisingly, I was quickly mistaken for a street performer and tossed a quarter by a passerby.

Behind Every Faithful Man is a Very Smart Woman

Take a look at my 5 tips on how to keep your man happy and interested. As seen in the May 2008 issue of L.A. Direct Magazine.

Let’s just face it: some men cheat. Open up any national newspaper these days and you’ll see the evidence. Now that’s not to say the women in these relationships are the ones to blame. Some men just aren’t born with the monogamous gene. But it does inspire some interesting questions about whether or not infidelity can be avoided. In researching my novel, The Fidelity Files, I found that faithful relationships tend to have one thing in common: a woman who knows how to handle her man. And there’s a lot to be learned from these women’s secrets so I’ve compiled a list of my favorite tips on how to keep your man’s attention fully focused on you.

1) Don’t Reveal the Woman Behind the Curtain

For those of us who aren’t 22 anymore, it actually takes time and some effort to make ourselves look beautiful. But men don’t necessarily need to know that. Laura, 53, has been married to the same loyal and devoted husband for 30 years. And she says the secret to a happy marriage is separate bathrooms. “When we go out at night, I want him to look at me and think, ‘Wow, she’s so effortlessly striking.’ That’s why I never let him see me getting ready. It’s like going backstage at Disneyland. The magic is ruined.” One of the reasons dating is so much fun for men is because a beautiful woman simply appears before him and he doesn’t see the process behind it. Keeping this same illusion alive in your relationship can help restore some of the mystery that naturally fades away with time.

2) “Come Here Often?”

The honeymoon phase is called a “phase” for a reason. Eventually the novelty wears off and gives way to one of the biggest relationship threats of all: routine. When this happens, it’s important to make an extra effort to keep things interesting. Michael, a retired restaurant owner, says his wife sometimes likes to pretend to be strangers in public. “She’ll be sitting at the bar, looking amazing, and I get to try to pick her up. When she agrees to come home with me, I end up looking like the biggest stud in the room. It’s a major ego boost.” Most men enjoy the thrill of a flirtatious encounter. A role play such as this one is a safe and fun way to bring this thrill back into a long-term relationship.

3) Support His Crazy Dreams

He wants to start a rock band but he hasn’t picked up an instrument since his high school clarinet. It may sound impossible, but it’s still his dream. The key is to be there for him whether it succeeds or not. Corey, 31, is an online content producer with a dream of becoming a documentary filmmaker. One of the things that has kept him so devoted to his wife of seven years is the unconditional support she offers him. “I work weird hours and am always juggling several jobs at once. There are some projects I’ve worked on for over a year without making a penny and she’s still my number one cheerleader. I can’t imagine finding another woman like that.”

4) No Strings Attached

By giving your man the space and freedom to be his own person and do his own thing without expecting anything in return, his respect for you as a companion increases exponentially. “My wife lets me host a bi-monthly poker game at our house and she has never once complained or used it as a bargaining chip,” says Corey, 31. “She’s so cool about things like that. It makes me really proud to tell people she’s my wife.”

5) Don’t Skip out on the Sex

Men like sex. This information is nothing new. But sometimes it’s worth reminding that there is a strong correlation between a healthy marriage and a healthy sex life. “Not everyone is blessed with a supercharged libido,” says Laura, 53. “That’s why, as a woman, it is your own responsibility to figure out what turns you on so you can continue to have a sex life.” Katie, age 30, has two young children, a full-time job, and still manages to find time to experiment in the bedroom. “I try to surprise my husband with things he wouldn’t expect. It keeps him on his toes because he’s constantly wondering what I have in store for him next.” And a man who is busy wondering about you, doesn’t have time to wonder about anyone else.

Now Hiring: British Fidelity Inspectors

Think you have what it takes to be "Ashlyn" from The Fidelity Files? Wanna flirt with married men for a living and catch cheaters in the act? Well, apparently if you live England, someone is looking for you.

BBC News recently released an article about a Yorkshire-based Honey Trap agency that is trying to recruit "flirtatious men and women to test the fidelity of clients' partners." Which only proves yet again that the Brits are WAY ahead of us in the world of Fidelity Inspections. But not for long. The Fidelity Files is being released in 22 days and it's going to change everything!

Anyway, enough plugging, here's the article:

http://news.bbc.co.uk/1/hi/england/3078394.stm

Good luck. Go forth and honey trap!

Real Life Fidelity Inspectors on Fox News L.A.

If you thought "fidelity inspections" were only things that happened in books like The Fidelity Files, then you thought wrong.

Check out this Fox News L.A. story about real life "Love Decoys" that aired on April 29th:

Life is Short...Have an Affair

This is the scandalous tag line in the new Ashley Madison Agency commercial that I just saw. I swear, this agency continues to baffle me. I can't decide if they're a disgrace or just fulfilling a need. An online dating site exclusively for married people? What will they think of next? Drive through divorce proceedings?

Would you like fries with your alimony payment, Mr. Smith?

And yes, I know I already blogged about this agency last month but I just saw this commercial for them on the History Channel and I had to share. Yes, you heard that right. The History Channel! No, I didn't accidentally mistake it for Spike TV. Apparently the marketing execs over at Ashley Madison think that this their target demographic. Who knew that History buffs were so prone to cheat on their spouses? All this time, I've been avoiding those types of guys who watch Nascar and The Man Show when I should be have been steering clear of the ones who watch Modern Marvels and specials about World War II.

Anyway, enough babbling. Here's the commercial, already. It's quite saucy. So watch at your own risk.

How Does Cheating Translate?

What's in a name? That which we call "infidelity" by any other name would still smell as sour.

Or would it?

Shakespeare may have been onto something about roses, but when it comes to matters of extramarital sex, I don't think the same philosophy applies.

We are all aware of the negative connotation that American society puts on words like "infidelity", "unfaithfulness" and "cheating". The verb "to cheat" implies some sort of breaking of the rules and therefore conjures up images of moral impropriety. Cheating on a test? Bad. Cheating on your wife? Bad. Cheating at solitaire? Well, that's just sad.

But let's take a look at what other countries are calling sex outside the marriage. According to Pamela Druckerman, author of a book called Lust in Translation, the name a society gives to the act also tends to define how that society views the act itself. For example, the term that Nigerians use for infidelity literally translates to "social networking". Hmm...is that like MySpace? Or Facebook? Well, I have over 100 friends on that MySpace and Facebook. So what does that make me? Actually, don't answer that.

Or in Finland, the act of sex with someone other than your promised partner translates to "parallel relationships". I kind of like that one. It's like Parallel Universes. Or dimensions. "So I have a husband in this dimension, a lover in another dimension and I'm secretly seeing someone named Captain Kirk in a dimension that I don't even want to talk about."

And Druckerman also states that the French, who have in the past been infamous for their inability to be monogamous, have coined the expression, "simultaneous multi-partnerships". Well, you would think that a society that prides themselves on fine wines, great food and beautiful lovers would find a more scintillating term than "simultaneous multi-partnerships". Will we also be signing a business merger agreement with this extramarital
affair?

So apparently, while we're equating infidelity to having an ace up your sleeve at a poker game or selling someone a used car with an odometer that's been cracked open, the rest of the world doesn't all see it that way. Are we being too harsh in our labeling? Too judgmental in our words? Or are we just staying true to our puritan roots?

After all, we did escape Europe and their laissez-faire views of the world for a reason. And I certainly don't remember seeing any red letter 'A's sewn onto clothing the last time I was in Paris. Although I guess that would explain why I got a strange look from that French accountant after I told him I was thinking of setting up a Sole Proprietorship.

'Tis the Season of Taxes and Cheating Spouses

April 15th looms in the air. And accountants and IRS agents alike are all burning the midnight oil. But according to a recent article by Infidelity Expert, Ruth Houston, author of Is He Cheating on You?: 829 Telltale Signs, this is a time when suspicious women should also be doing a little tax investigation of their own. Because tax season is also apparently the time of year when cheating husbands are brought out into the open.

Because let's face it, he may be able to hide all those suspicious looking receipts from you, but he can't hide them from Uncle Sam.

The article suggests that wives suspicious of infidelity can use their joint filing status as an opportunity to follow a possible paper trail leading to evidence of an affair. Houston sources one woman who found evidence of jewelry purchases, lingerie, roses and hotel rentals in the upper west side of Manhattan (wait a minute, was this David Paterson's wife?) And since her own neck, wrists, vases and groin area were all disappointingly bare, she assumed that these gifts were purchased for another woman. Or just the evidence of a really inappropriate mother/son relationship.

Infidelity Expert Houston also recommends that you check out Line 7 of your 1040 Form. Because this is where a potentially cheating husband is supposed to report all of his overtime payments at work. With a quick mental calculation, you can easily figure out whether or not his supposed "working late" was really "working late" and therefore recorded on his tax forms as overtime payments or just "working someone else".

Ruth Houston offers these and several more tips in her recently published article which can be found at: http://hometown.aol.com/cheatingsigns/page72.html

So suspicious women everywhere, put down his cell phone bill and start getting out your calculators. And as for the cheating men that have been successfully hiding their affairs, all I can say is, beware because Cheater Buster, Uncle Sam is on the case.

And you thought the threat of an audit was the scariest thing about filing a tax return...

Quality Affairs at the Quality Hotel

Someone really has to tell me what they're putting in the water over there in that Tri-State area.

Spitzer's Prostitution ring in New York, McGreevey's semi-homosexual threesomes in New Jersey, and now the new NY Governor, David A. Paterson is being accused of using campaign money to rent seedy hotel rooms in the Upper West Side of Manhattan in order to conduct his serial extramarital affairs. (Wait, do seedy hotel rooms even exist in the Upper West Side of Manhattan? Or is that an oxymoron?)

The blogosphere is buzzing. TV news viewers are hooked. And all the sources seem to be reporting the same thing: Paterson has claimed that yes, he did occassionally use his campaign credit card to rent rooms at the Quality Hotel on the Upper West Side for $100 bucks a pop when his other personal cards were declined, but he swore on his grave that he always reimbursed the card afterwards. Well, that's nice. And very considerate. "Hey campaign contributors, my credit card doesn't seem to be working. I have no idea why. I'll have to call the bank in the morning and sort it all out. In the meantime, I've got a girl waiting down here (wink, wink), mind if I borrow a few bucks from y'all if I promise to pay you back tomorrow. Cross my heart and hope to die."

Yes, that's exactly how it went down in my mind.

But the bigger question here that nobody seems to be asking is why did he choose the Quality Hotel (now the Days Inn) in the first place? Out of all the beautiful places to stay in Manhattan and he comes to the Quality Hotel? This is what I really want to know. Was it because it was discreet? Anonymous? Cheap? I mean, if his credit cards are getting turned down at the Quality Hotel, maybe it was a matter of penny pinching necessity. Or did he just read a really kick-ass review on Hotels.com? I believe I must have missed the "Ease of Affair" attribute in the five-star rating system.

I do know this much, however. The Quality Hotel (or Days Inn) on the Upper West Side, is no longer discreet, anonymous or cheap. In fact, it's now probably the most talked-about, frequented hotel in New York. And I actually feel kind of sorry for all those non-celebrity cheaters who often frequented this little gem of a hideaway. Now they'll have to start going to the real seedy hotels in Jersey with the rest of the seedy adulterers.

The Brits Love Their Honey

You've gotta love the web. You can find everything about anything or anyone at any hour of the day. I'm honestly not sure what we did before it? I'm trying to remember....nope, just can't do it. Although something called an Encyclopedia seems to ring a bell.

For instance, the other day I found a website for a real-life agency in the UK that you can pay to send a hot man or woman to test the fidelity of your spouse or significant other. That's right. A real-life fidelity inspector, just like the main character in my novel. And here I thought I was just being extremely creative.

Try locating "Fidelity Inspector" in the Encyclopedia Britannica. Exactly. Hmmm....just give me a second to pull this giant "F" volume from the shelf here...

And after locating this agency, which appropriately calls themselves "Honey Trappers," I got curious and wanted to see who else was talking about Honey Trappers and Fidelity Inspectors on the world wide web. And for a country like America that is so in love with our sex scandals, I found surprisingly little information here on our own cyber shores but much to choose from abroad, particularly in the UK. Apparently, the Brits are not taking this infidelity thing lying down (so to speak).

For example, in my search, I came across this article: http://ridethelightning.senseient.com/2008/02/brits-hire-hott.html, written by the Sharon D. Nelson, Esq., President of Sensei Enterprises, a computer forensics and electronic evidence company. The article explores this so-called Honey Trapping phenomenon across the pond where the business of testing your loved ones appears to be booming. Essentially these PIs are hired to show up at the subject in question's favorite local pub or other highly frequented location and flirt with them to see if they take the bait. And according to this article, 80% of these "sting" operations fail.

A surprisingly high percentage? I'm going to go out on a limb here and say, "Not." Because let's break this down. What kind of women (and men) are going to be hiring these kind of agencies in the first place? The suspicious kinds. And if you take into consideration women's (and men's) keen intuition when it comes to matters of the heart, this is not an 80% failure rate, but rather an 80% success rate. 80% of these women (and men) were correct in their suspicions and had good reason to hire the agency in the first place.

But then of course there's the question of whether or not a test like this is an accurate measuring of someone's faithful tendencies. But I think I'll leave that honey trap of a subject for another time.

The Proof is in the MySpace Profile

I don't have a PhD in psychology. I didn't study human behavior at Harvard. I don't have a plaque on my wall that qualifies me to make assessments about other people's relationships. But I do have eyes that are usually open and a common sense that is usually fine tuned...and a MySpace account that is in good standing. And I'm going to go out on a limb here and say that those three attributes have given me some pretty in-depth insight into the world of infidelity.

This is the story of something that happened to me a few years back that has obviously stuck with me over time, otherwise I would never be to re-tell it with such acute detail. One boring and uneventful day at work, I was browsing through my extended network of profiles on MySpace and I came across the page of one of my boyfriend's close friends. Let's call him Tom (because everyone knows a Tom on MySpace).

Now Tom was recently known to be in a semi-serious relationship with "Judy." And the only reason I knew that was because my friend, "Rachel," seriously wanted to get with Tom. But alas, she could not because, you know, Judy was in the picture. So I told her he was off-limits. But that particular day, I'm browsing through Tom's profile, being the nosy MySpacer that I am and I decide that I'd really like to get a look at this infamous Judy. But as I scan his page, I find that there is absolutely no evidence of her to be found. She hasn't left comments. She's not pictured in any of the photos. She's not even listed in the Top 8 Friends. Judy is unmistakably absent. And so I decide to investigate further. I scroll down to the profile information box and see that he is in fact, "single" again and "looking for a relationship" Hooray! I think and immediately get on Instant Messenger to tell Rachel that Hottie Tom is finally back on the market. Then I whip up a quick email to Tom's regular non-MySpace email address and tell him that I heard he was single again and wondered if he'd be interested in going for a drink with me and Rachel, whom he'd met once before at a party and thought was cute.

A few days go by and no response from Tom. And I'm getting a little annoyed because Hello! Rachel is hot and she and Tom would make a very adorable couple. But I calm myself down and think, okay, perhaps he's still getting over Judy and therefore not ready to date yet. I can respect that.

Finally, after a week has passed I get an email from Tom. And I can already hear the choir serenading me with a rendition of "Matchmaker, Matchmaker, make me a match!"

But when I open the email, I find that it is not in fact from Tom. Although it is sent from Tom's email address. But the letter itself, is actually from Judy! And she's writing it from Tom's email account! Now, this happened a few years ago so I'm going to have to paraphrase, but basically the email went something like this:

I don't know who you are or what you think you're doing but Tom is NOT single nor has he been for the past six months. We are extremely happy together so I'd appreciate if you'd stop trying to fix him up with your single friends.

Sincerely,
Judy (Tom's Girlfriend)

You can imagine the considerable restraint it took me to not immediately punch in a hasty and very petty reply such as "if you're so happy together a) why does his MySpace page say he's single with absolutely no trace of you whatsoever and b) why do you feel the need to read AND respond to his emails? And I know some of you are going to think that I should have done exactly that. But I truly felt that it wasn't my place. If Judy felt the need to read Tom's emails on a regular basis then she had enough problems on her plate and she certainly didn't need to add me to the growing list. And if Judy is anything like the person her email suggests, then I imagine Tom would be hearing enough about this from her and probably didn't require my help in that department either. So I kept my mouth shut. I didn't reply and I didn't attempt to make any further contact.

When I told my boyfriend the story later that night, he informed me that Tom is one of those guys who likes to keep a MySpace profile that reads "single," just in case. Just in case what? Just in case his girlfriend finds it, kicks his ass to the curb and then he has a head start on the dating game? Hmmm....the logic in that seemed just a little bit fuzzy. And what did my boyfriend mean by "one of those guys who likes to keep a single MySpace profile?" Is this what men are doing nowadays to keep their options open? And if so, wouldn't this be the first tip-off to Judy that there's just the slightest chance Tom doesn't really see her as a "long-term" thing? And if it is, why bother writing the email to me at all? Save your time and finger muscles and just dump him and move on to someone who respects you. Someone who loves you enough to take that giant leap of faith, make the commitment and change his MySpace profile to "In a relationship."

But again, it's not really my call to make. And it's not really my place to judge.

I'm no longer with my boyfriend at the time and in staying true to traditional break-up rules, I no longer hang out with any of his friends. And so I don't have a clue what Tom or Judy are up to these days? But to this day, I do often wonder. Did they make it? Are they still together? Is she still fending off potential matchmakers on Tom's behalf? And did he ever find it in his heart to update his MySpace page?

My curiosity recently got the better of me and I went searching once again for Tom's profile but I couldn't find it. Maybe he changed his name. Maybe he went into the witness protection program and came out with a whole new web identity. Or maybe in the end, he decided that his very own online space just wasn't worth the drama.

When Monogamy Becomes Monotony

So what does happen when monogamy becomes monotony? Well, according to a very unique website that was recently brought to my attention, when monogamy becomes monotony, the answer is simple: Start meeting other monotonous monogamists online at www.ashleymadison.com--a website strictly devoted to married dating. That's right, married dating. And here I thought "married dating" was an oxymoron. Well, as it turns out, it's a website.

The Ashley Madison Agency is the host of the site where bored married men and women can have online affairs that may or may not also lead to offline affairs. Although the site's FAQ section claims that they don't encourage infidelity, nor do they believe that a service such as this makes it easier for married people to stray, it does beg a few interesting questions.

We all know that there are plenty of married people registered on match.com and other popular dating sites (if you didn't already know or suspect this, then it's time to pack up your things, file a change of address with the post office and move out of the cave you've been inhabiting for the past ten years) but I would assume that most of the members on those mainstream dating sites are trying to appear not married. In other words, deceivingly posing as singletons in the hopes of landing a new, non-monotonous date. It's the virtual equivalent of taking off your wedding ring when a hot girl walks into the bar. But apparently the members on this particular niche site have nothing to hide. After all, the site clearly states that it was designed for married people looking for affairs. (I guess it's true, there is something for everyone on the internet.)

But this seems to present quite a paradox in my mind. Doesn't the very definition of an affair automatically imply some level of secrecy? Is cheating really cheating if it's done right out there in the open with search engine key words like "married dating" "extramarital affairs" and "cheating husbands" labeling the act for all to see (and google)?

I would think that being this open and relatively public about your desire to stray only opens yourself up to a higher chance of getting caught. Is the Ashley Madison Agency website eventually going to replace a man's email account as the go-to place to look for signs of a cheating spouse? Because if you were suspicious of your man's ability to stay faithful, wouldn't this be one of the first places you looked?

You can't browse the selection without a membership, however registration is free and I would guess there aren't all too many hoops to jump through before you are granted full access to their ever expanding database of the unfaithful. This is, without a doubt, the real, online version of "the fidelity files." And the key to the top secret file cabinet is only an email address and a 6-8 digit password away.